Friday, August 13, 2010

Hearing ourselves in our children

Anyone who has children old enough has probably noticed the impact we as parents have on their speech, mannerisms, phrasing and so on. Sometimes this is hilarious, other's....not so much. Sometimes I hear Troy, my 4 year old, say something and it's so cute. Like for instance the other day my husband asked why was he asking so many questions. Troy's reply? "Just for the sake of asking Daddy." That got quite a chuckle out of everyone in ear shot and when I walked in and heard I had to laugh because I ask him all the time, "Why are you asking questions just for the sake of asking?" I know he doesn't truly understand but he knew exactly how to repeat it. Unfortunately, this can go for other things as well. We're having a huge problem with Troy disciplining Will. Troy is always saying things like, "When I count to three, you better stop doing that. 1..2..3...Okay NOW you lost it" as he takes something. Or he'll tell Will, "Sit down or get down" then proceed to pull him off the furniture which obviously isn't the safest thing. It's frustrating as all get out, but how do I stop it because he's simply copying me and thinking he's helping. Is he? I don't know. Sometimes yes, but sometimes it sets Will off on a tantrum. I don't want Troy being a "babysitter" at age 4 but he certainly takes on the responsibility of copying me. If anyone has any suggestions, please share!
The other problem I have with hearing myself in Troy....I don't like how "I" sound. Troy has really shown me that I have issues with my yelling, getting frustrated with piddly things, and talking down about myself. He'll say something negative about himself, yell or get really frustrated and do this UGH sound and cross his arms, slam a door....whatever and I fuss at him. Then it hits me....that was me I just heard. It's definitely a wake up call that I need to listen to myself a lot more.

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